Hayley Jane Warnes on not following the herd

I read this post last week, by the babe that is Alice Tate and it really resonated with me… More and more recently, I’ve been feeling like I’m playing catch up. Like there are a million and one things I should be doing to help further my life and career, on top of what I’m already doing, yet when I really stop and ask myself, what is right for me? I struggle to find an answer. Now, this perhaps sounds way more dramatic than it’s meant to, I guess I’m talking about the more subtle nuances of life and career, specific parts of my job, as opposed to the bigger picture things. Either way, it’s time to double down on the things that are important and on the flip side, time to stop chasing the things that aren’t.


As Alice rightly says, we’re so bombarded by snippets of everyone’s seemingly perfect lives and careers, that it’s easy to get lost in trying to be and do the same, even if we never actually subconsciously set out to emulate another’s lifestyle.


We all know that our power lies in our uniqueness, correct? I think that knowledge is innate, even if we let fear get in the way of it, deep down we all know it. I spent all of my teens and 20s doing anything I could to stand out! Cutting all my hair off… Wearing ‘crazy’ clothes when everyone else was in blue jeans, flats and neat little jumpers… Getting tattoos at a ridiculously young age (sorry Mum)… Moving away, moving abroad… Being freelance… Doing anything I could to not feel like I was the ‘same’ as everyone else. I was hell-bent on forging my own path, personally and professionally. That wild, driven spirit, despite being misguided at times (read – often) is something that I actually really, really want to hold onto.

I am now officially in my thirties and what better time to really be me? I have more stability in my life, great relationships, the wisdom of age and a lifetime of experiences (infinitely more than I had at 18, anyway!) I’m less likely to make bad choices (I hope)… All the signs point towards laying aside any pretence and just being unapologetically me, no more time wasting.

Sounds good, right?!

Well, if like me, you catch yourself working towards and wishing for something that actually, you’re not sure you want in the first place, down tools! It’s time to reassess and recalculate your route. It’s never too late to make a change, no matter how far down a path you might be, no matter what other people might think. Life is far too short to waste valuable energy chasing after things we don’t actually want.

Make 2018 the year you do everything in your power to stop following the herd and instead be unapologetically, uniquely, wonderfully YOU. Great things will happen, I’m telling you.

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